Sunday, 21 October 2012

The myth of unconditional love?

Been up since 5.30am. Early...too early. Felt too ill to sleep. Popped to the shop to get some more lemons. Shopping in the dark as the country sleeps.
Well before I clamber back to bed, I thought I’d write a little.
Wanted to talk about unconditional love. Yes, that thing many of us seek, yet take for granted once gained. You see it takes a level of maturity I think, to recognise it, and see it not as a weakness, but as a thing of great beauty. I think it takes a level of maturity to control the egos attempts to ruin it, or make a mockery of it.
But what exactly is it?.

If a man (or woman) beats up on their partner for example, should they love unconditionally?
Can a person expect to receive unconditional love from another if they themselves are not capable of such a thing themselves?
Perhaps it's the absence of expectation, and is simply an overwhelming will to love.. a natural state of being.
In the main, most people would say unconditional love is when a person loves them, or they love another... flaws and all. Loves them even if they act up or play the fool... makes mistakes... argue. But what about if a man (or woman) loses all the joint funds on a bad business investment...makes it back... then foolishly loses it all again?
How do you know if unconditional love is what you have for a person?
Do we love people for who they are.. or who we hope they will be..?

Well... unconditional love does not mean that no other emotions ( such as anger) will be experienced.. but love provides a light.. understanding.. reason.
It calms anger and heals wounds
Would it be fair to say unconditional love is love? And anything else really isn’t love at all... but something else entirely?

If a person abuses that love, perhaps it's simply a result of them not having the ability to receive it, to understand it, mainly because they may just not be ready for it, not mature enough for it, feel threatened or intimidated by it... as one can only receive what one has the ability to feel, see, know, acknowledge or give also.

But is it overrated?

For example... a plant will only grow on condition that the conditions are right for it
A cup of tea will only taste sweet on condition we add sweetener to it.
To that end, we only grow as people on condition that we are open to it, or else we remain stagnant, unless of course we are forced into action by drastic earthly or unearthly forces out of our control.
So can we be loving and that not be reflected in our actions?. I think not.

Many of us manipulate it..fear it, question or doubt it.. instead of just letting it be.
Love is felt from the very soul..surely 'mans' greatest quest.. and greatest achievement.

So my question today this Sunday morn is... do we truly love... or simply just expect to receive it?

Happy SMSx


  1. Love is a wonderful something. However, if we don't love ourselves, we can't love anyone else. So many of us, just don't love oursevles and don't know how to. I find that it's easier to forgive other people, than myself. None of us are perfect, such is life.

  2. "an overwhelming will to love.. a natural state of being" couldn't agree more. Is love inherently unconditional? I've been loved where I didn't love back and vice versa. Still it feels good when somebody loves you back. love is love as the song goes.

    Now lets have a meaty discussion about the personal sacrifices required by love ..