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Saturday, 14 March 2015

I can't sleep!

My insomnia is back. Not in a major way but I sleep a little then wake.
Restless
I think it's stress.
I'm working quite hard at the moment to move things forward but it feels like an uphill struggle


I need some time to meditate, and take stock.

This rock feels like I've been pushing it for too long.
This hill feels like I've worn a groove in it.

I must be doing something wrong.
I know I don't need to work any harder.
I do believe that I need to do things in a different way.
I need to think in a different way.

I'm still stalling on the business front etc and that makes me feel like crying.
My desire is to invest in something. To be self sufficient

'What am I not doing?'
I know that I cannot continue to do things in the same way and expect a different result

I have my graduation coming up. The costs of the day reminded me of just how much money ive invested over the past few years on my education.
I'm yet to use it
Apply it.
I'm grateful for what I have
.. but I have limited to no opportunity currently to apply my knowledge and skills to the full
It's frustrating
I intend to continue my education, yet my income needs to increase
Education is not cheap
Having ambition is not cheap
Having dreams - cost
Yet they are essential - to me.
I cannot imagine my life without them

These things are keeping me awake at night..

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