Thursday 19 September 2013

Polygamy..

Why make one woman unhappy... when you can make several, really miserable...

Okay... I’ll be serious for a moment. Then again..perhaps not.

I watched a video the other day, featuring a very smart academic, on the subject of polygamy. He spoke about African polygamy, stated that women control the system of polygamy, and originally, it was as a result of males dying in battle etc, and that it became clear that an alternative system, (away from one man to one woman), was required. Without such an alternative, he argued, the result would have been chaos, fighting among women, illegitimate children, and some women remaining husband-less and child-less for ever.
(There was no discussion on whether the women even wanted a husband or children, it was a given)

Anyway, he stated that prior to marriage, a man would go to the council of elders; state his case, credentials, and ability to maintain a wife, and family. The elders would hear his case, and then seek guidance from the spiritual elders, who would then seek to ascertain whether or not the man and woman involved would be a match, spiritually, mentally, physically, and whether it would be prudent for them both to be joined in a marriage.
If deemed a good match. That would be that. It would be agreed that they should marry
okay.. logical..
That man would then undergo the same process with additional wives.

Anyway, he then went on to state very humorously what he would like to see as a model.
A list = the first wife. A young virgin.
B list = not a virgin, perhaps a single mum, but still youthful...
C list? = over 45, married before, few kids, still appealing however
D list? = the rough ones, who he described as wayward, the fighters, the wild ones, possibly a conviction or two, yet not entirely rehabilitated.
According to him, every woman deserves a husband, and none should be left out. The most useful of all, in his eyes, would be the D list-ers, as a D list-er, would keep the others in line, and kick some arse, if the other wives stepped outa line.

I stopped taking him seriously on this after his first intake of breath
But found his views interesting nonetheless


Polygamy appears to be one of those conversations/dreams that some men have.
I guess it’s a fantasy, like any other
For others.. a reality.
Whilst it may prove beneficial under certain circumstance, and amidst some cultures, it tends to raise a smile from me, when I hear men in the western world speak of it.


.
Sure there are many who practice it, I've watched a few documentaries on it, but the women that I’ve seen interviewed have never come across as particularly happy.
Each to their own I guess
I can state that I’ve never met a man who deserved more than one wife. To be honest, some really could do with being grateful they have one at all.
He would have to be some kinda guy
If fully present in the relationship.. If you truly turn up fully.. Isn't one wife more than enough to keep one busy?.

His overall case was that polygamy was not for the men.. but for the women.

**

Chatting to a friend the other day about her dating experiences. I began to think about the little kinks, likes and dislikes we as people tend to have
I can honestly say that men with a breast fascination scare me. What is that about?
Is it something to do with being, or rather not being breastfed?
Well...too late...

11 comments:

  1. "If fully present in the relationship.. If you truly turn up fully.." does that ever happen in a relationship though? Well after the first year I mean.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hmmm.. to be honest.. perhaps not in reality..
    3mths seems to be the honeymoon phase :)
    I'd like to think so though.. Ok.. Maybe 1 day per week?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Quite frankly, that academic sounds like he has his head up his ass.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He started off well enough.. he really did..then in seemed to descend into bit of a childish..chest thumping session. Made me laugh abit though :)

      Delete
  4. Ha, yeah you are probably right with the 3 months! Having been with someone for 27 years I do know it's hard work keeping the magic alive.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Well.. after 27yrs years you both must be doing something right. Wonder if Joe is an ole romantic at heart....?
    Friend of mine said no charade can begin past 3mths..that's when the true relationship begins!..
    (although they'll always be those who buck that trend)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Maybe you're right about the breast infatuation.....but maybe those men just really like breasts Dawna Lee?!?

    I agree about the polygamy thing.....I would run away from that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm..maybe they do Reggie..
      But some could try to focus a little more on the woman they're attached to! :)

      Delete
  7. My husband has a hard enough time dealing with me and all my weirdness. He would not do well with more than one wife.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not married.. but if i were.. i don't think my husband would do well with more than one wife either!

      Delete