Friday 30 December 2011

A-Z?...File under rank...

I’m always on a quest for answers (well... nearly always... well... sometimes at the very least;)
So.. I often look back over my past experiences to gain new insight, or find out if there is any to be had, that I may have simply overlooked
Today, I thought about an old boyfriend. He with the penchant for the odd secret society. (Don’t ask!)
Can’t stand him...
No seriously...can’t...so I’m not sure why I thought of him at all... today of all days.
In doing so however, I then tried to figure out what the lesson was there, as maybe I had missed something.
Long story short, it involved a cacophony of elaborate lies, all designed to obscure the fact he had a finance, was about to get married, and was also seeing another woman... whom I also I knew.
For the life of me I can’t figure out what the lesson was there:-)
Or why I even played hostess at that particular party... still
There was at least, some semblance of a party..

So what was the lesson?
That people can lie? I already knew that. .. and the rest, so ... what?
This had led me to the conclusion that sometimes there are no lessons...or answers... Sometimes it’s a dead end. A blank.

If it were a game of cards it would be like playing the joker.
On the street filled with houses... the cul- de -sack...
On the pavement ..a used and losing scratch card.
A car without petrol...
In the cold.. an electric heater.. without ele....errrr you get the drift I’m sure:)

These are the times when humour is best discovered or rediscovered... and you accept that your senses may have been slightly askew as you head back down another path
Get your spiritual paperwork in order, and then... as the title suggests...just, file- under- rank

All normal end of year pondering for me

love this song ;-) dance with me Olly Murs..

Just makes me smile.. and quite honestly.. want to dance..



wow .. that's a 1st .. my blog play list includes Capleton & Olly Murs on the same page.. beat that Heart F.M lol

Good morning people :-).. enjoy the last days of 2011!!

Thursday 29 December 2011

Thought of the day: truth...

Words can be 'fickle'.. it's in our thoughts and our actions that the truth can be found..

Dark skinned women; strangers in a strange land?..

I could possibly fill a book with my experiences of racism.
I thought about my earliest experiences of racism to try and figure out how and why I became so aware of it, and why it holds such an interest for me.

I was born in 1968 the year Martin Luther King Jr was killed.
The backdrop of my childhood was one of civil rights, police oppression, white racism, and a UK intent on playing ‘bad host’ to its black citizens..
Yep..I was a conscious child

I had a happy childhood.

Didn’t expect me to say that huh... well I did... very happy.
My parents did their best to shield their children from the harsh realities of life, encouraged us to think of ourselves as 'English', and I don’t recall ever hearing the words racist or racism in the home at all.
In fact my parents often shared their company and home with both black and white friends.
Yet... I knew racism. I saw it; I felt it, and it was clear to me that it would be a part of my life.

Early experiences.. hmmm let me see...
Okay...I remember being chosen to play Goldilocks once... the lead in the school play.
A little white girl said to her mum, “that’s not fair... she can’t be Goldilocks... she’s black!”
“I know!" Her mum said... looking disgusted that her own child should be denied the lead...
She had a word with the teacher
It was too late for her to take the role from me but what she did do was give the ‘pretty princess’ dress to the other girl and give me the most disgusting deep purple velvet 'ugly sister’ dress ( don’t laugh!).. instead.
As young as I was. I was f***** off...big time
My mum was with me... I wanted her to say something, but she focused on me... telling me how lovely I looked blah blah (how we could 'jazz it up'!)...
Cool.. ( that didn't fly mum:))
'ah whe di rarse!!' I wanted to say as I snatched the dress back from the womans cold hearted clammy little hands.. but my mother was always a beacon of dignity.. and I didn't want to let her down.. no... a dirty look, would have to suffice:)

Truth be told... even now.. I hate the colour purple.. Ironic huh as it's my mothers favourite colour.. so I was destined to see much much more of the damn thing!!)

There are more tales... but I won’t go into that now...
My point is. Despite my parents best efforts... it was happening, and they could do nothing to stop it.

Yet I believe my experiences, and awareness of racism may be more acute because I am dark skinned... "hello.. I'm Dawna and i'm a dark skinned girl".. nice to meet you!!:)

Yes, I am convinced that my experiences of it are felt deeper due to my higher levels of melanin.
Why do I say that?
Well because the shock waves that reverberate within our communities mean that those who are lighter in complexion are often more 'valued’ or at the very least are viewed more 'desirable' , 'attractive', and a greater 'commodity'.
Myth or reality? You tell me...

Although no one has ever said it directly to me, I’ve heard what people say about others of a dark complexion ( even whilst speaking to me) and it can be quite derogatory.
In fact, it may even be a much harder struggle.
Comments like... she would be pretty if she was light are spoken in black and Asian communities alike, and I know of 'acquaintances' who have chosen their partners specifically because they are very fair, and have what they consider to be ‘good hair’ (men and women) simply because they don’t want their own children to be dark.
Such is the fear... such is the knowledge of how different life can be for those who are.

And most of us know, that dark skinned women are far quicker to be 'labelled' aggressive, hostile or difficult, than women of a lighter hue.. in fact... than any other woman, period.
Confusing?
No not really
All things considered, it makes perfect sense... as do the denials that often accompany it
Confusing?
Not really.. not if you understand racism
Unacceptable?
Yes
Time for a change?
Yes

Dark skinned women see the world through a darker lens

Will we always be strangers in a strange land?... well... that’s up to us

It's never too late..

I really like listening to heart radio at night..chills me right out..helps me to think. I heard this song a few times.. and it stuck with me..

The line.. 'it's never too late to turn it back around' resonated with me because, without that belief I don't see how anyone could possibly go forward.

Stuff happens in life. Some things we like, some we don't. We make choices, some seem to make sense.. (and work well for us) others seem like poor choices.
Yet every choice we make takes us on a journey to where we should be.. and perhaps If we learn the lessons.. a bad choice...could turn out to have been the best choice one could ever make.

Although I often point out many dire situations/ or circumstances in my posts I believe there are always solutions. Solutions that begin with the action taken by one individual. There is always an opposite number right?.. where there's a down there is always an up..

From the outside looking in, I've made what some may ( myself Included) consider to have been poor choices.. yet each one taught me a lesson
and whilst I hope I've learnt enough to no longer make such choices I dare say should it occur again.. there will be a reason

I've posted two versions because I think the lyrics are great..



Return to the Antique riddim.. ft Cecile & Capleton..



Monday 26 December 2011

Thought of the day.. why?

Cash rich and soul poor
Our decent into 'hell' continues..

How much more suffering must there be before the collective change that is needed to save us from ourselves will occur.
R.I.P the young man who lost his life today in Oxford Street.

I'm so sorry for his family.
A young life lost amidst the bulging crowds of sale hungry shoppers..
Heaven help us all..
'We' have lost touch with who are .. with humanity.. with 'god'
We need help

Peace
We need peacex

The 'N' word..

Is the use of the N word ever appropriate?
In my view ..no
If there is one word that I cannot abide it's that.
I tolerate it's use in certain songs.. but I don't like it
I fail to understand how it became popularised in 'modern culture' and despite the many attempts I've heard to re frame it as the 'evolution of language' and that words should be understood purely in their historical context, and merely chronicles 'mans' development.. (which is in part true)...
I still think it's counter productive.

Now, I'm told that it means 'brotherhood', signifies a bond etc..
Yet words do ( I believe) carry great power..
Freedom will always mean freedom for example
When we look back at some of the greatest speeches in history.. the choice of words carried with them the power to unite.. to capture and inspire hearts and minds..
If we can recognise the significance in that context..should we not also see the negative connotations in the use of the N Word?

Another reason I'm not convinced that the word can't shake it's history is because it's mainly used ( I think ) In America, by black Americans

Please forgive my historical ignorance, I'm not saying it wasn't used outside of America..but it's a word I mainly associate with the Southern States)

Here.. in the UK, words used to convey that type of 'brotherhood' are words like' 'fam'.. or 'blood' or 'cuz' ( A clear signifier of it's roots)

The N Word is never that clear. it can be, and is used. both as an insult and, or to symbolise friendship

Despite the monetary gain of many rappers and artists who have helped to popularise the term.. what they may not realise is they are also contributing to the regression of others of black African heritage.. and contributing to a form of mental slavery, that in many ways is harder to tackle.

If freedom begins with thought , expressed in words, manifested in life

Then perhaps those historical chains haven't loosened their grip as much as we may hope.

An N word documetary, part 1 of 10
*warning* contains 'offensive' language throughout

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6


Part 7


Part 8


Part 9

Part 10

Cracker treats..

Does anyone remember the fortune telling fish?

Well I haven't come across one for 'yonkers' until yesterday. As child I was convinced it worked.. tried it yesterday and It still gives me the 'heebejeebees'..
( how does it work?..:)



Got a new joke!.. (only, ended up it was kinda on me and the way my brain works)

Okay.. I was asked...

" Why did the man take the pencil to bed?"
I thought about it.. then replied
"Because he didn't have any 'rubbers'?.... were'd grandma get those crackers from?.. that's a bit adult aint it?

" Where- is -your- head at!?!" came the reply.. NO!!.. To draw-the-cur-tains!"

well ... of course

Mary J..



Quiet..

It's just gone 2am, and for reasons unclear to me I've decided to write.
Maybe it's the Eva Cassidy song playing on my laptop, I don't know.. but aside from the song... it's quiet.

Been a funny old day today.
The usual Christmas family shenanigans applied early on..which involved me feeling a bit 'narked' should we say.. at what I perceived to be the 'ridiculousness' of another.
It passed. It always does..

I learnt today that my children may actually know me!..as both my son and daughter bought me a book each. The Scramble for Africa.. and ..The Celestine Prophecy..
Funny.. all the while I was sure I was a virtual stranger that kept home.. kept it all going:)
So, that was real nice:)

As I sit here, I realise more than ever that my children really are grown up... and I am entering a new phase in my life.
The story that is me.
I'm not sure what part 2 will hold . Like part 1, I have aims and hopes.. things I'd like to do..experience

My assessment of part 1 would be hmmmmm... highs and lows..
I feel as though I've had more than my fair share of 'crap' ( there's no nice way of putting it)
So I hope part 2 fairs better than part 1.
Perhaps.. if my 'training' is complete... it will be so..
Still... my aim was not to write and weep..
It was simply to write about how quiet it is.. how peaceful it is.. and how I don't feel tired at all

Well.. I love Rays version but I also love the guitar accompaniment.. Evas version..
Maybe I'll get to bed now..


Saturday 24 December 2011

Words that heal..

Sometimes sorry just isn't enough..
Sometimes I wish I had the power to make things 'right'.. to think it.. and make it so
Sometimes I just gotta let go..turn things over to a higher force..
When it's too big a task for little me
When it's way beyond my understanding
and I struggle to find the words..
Sometimes prayer can bring comfort
Words of healing.. and hope
Sometimes the embrace of another
The warmth of another
A strong sense or belief that everything will be okay
It's not new years eve yet I know.. but many people ( including myself) have already begun to think ahead ( not forsaking right now)
Looking back at what has been for many .. quite a tough year
Time magazine has called it.. the year of the protester..

I pray for love peace and happiness, for the days, weeks, and months ahead..
for the strength and courage to overcome any obstacles
that an ounce of my joy could be felt by someone else.. right now
that the pursuit of love 'overtakes' the pursuit of money
That I learn at least 1 new joke
that I can be a comfort to someone.. a blessing to someone
As time propels us forwards into the unknown
Each one of us.. that little bit wiser
Battle weary maybe.. but battle ready
Guided by loves eternal..
For love is eternal

Bob Andy selection..









Motown!!..:))




I just like -this- song..Smokey!!!

Thursday 22 December 2011

The audacity of hope?... or a right?..

A friend of mine is reading the book, the ‘Secret’.
I remember when the book was published, I felt I had read it before, because it contained information that I had in fact read, but from a variety of other books over the years. The secret was like the abridged version.. yet nontheless, a worthy and recommended read.

Anyway... we talked about visualisation, and she basically explained that the time felt right for her to do some ‘soul searching'... ( which always fills me with joy) as usually when people say that, they begin to develop and grow in wonderful ways.
She looked happy and at ease with the prospect of delving deep into her psyche, and finding out what it is she really wants.
We talked about her evolution from angry teenager/experiences of racism, and how she has learnt not to wear the robes of others.
Ready now to create her own

Now... I’ve never 'seen' my parents as young... but truth is...when they came to the UK; they were in fact... younger than I am right now! Today I thought about the courage and maturity of their generation, and their ability to remain positive. In the face of some fairly difficult times... they had hope!.
Maybe they visualised a life back home, had a plan to return, perhaps it was their faith/s...who knows... whatever it was ... it kept them going

I wonder then if the real poverty faced by some of our communities really is economic ... or if it’s a poverty of hope that keeps many captive in a cycle of despair.
Feeling hopeless has the ability to zap energy...the energy needed to propel one forward to achieve fulfilment. Hope is not necessarily an audacity... hope is a right; one to be cherished at all costs,...as there may be times... When hope... is all you have.

Heptones classics..

Funny how there are some tunes you may not even be able to recall the names of, or even the singers /artists but you just know them so well..
Most of you by now would have picked up that I love the sounds of Studio 1, well today I've been able to indulge in some sweet revival tracks.. some of which I haven't heard in awhile, whislt exploring those which are rarely heard and a little more obscure..

Well I have some great vintage tracks on point and on pause, but for now I thought I'd indulge myself in a few Heptones classics..














Wednesday 21 December 2011

Conversations with elders...

A few weeks back I was having a conversation with my mum about racism and football... as you do on a Sunday in between songs of praise and countryfile!!

(*This is a mere reconstruction*)

At the time I think I was saying something like;
"I can’t understand why these guys continue to play when they hear monkey chants" and so on...
"Why don’t they walk off? refuse to play... take a stand... do something...say something for crying out loud!!"

To which my mum tried to explain to me that that;
"It may not be an easy thing for them to do!"
“Why??”
“They earn good money you know Dawna”
Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd!?!”
“You can’t just throw away the chance to earn good money like that... especially for players that come from those poor places in Africa”...
“Okay... hang on!!” (‘cause I’m thinking slavery done..)
“So what you're saying is, its okay to sell yourself, if the moneys good enough!?!”
“No, no, no, Jesus Christ no ( mums a church goer.. it's cultural, she means no offence)... that is not what I’m saying!”
I continued... held onto the fictional reigns of our dearly departed Red Rum ... saddled up...and asked my mother what she would say if I went out dancing on tables for a living!!... What about those women who sell their bodies then... on and on I went...
“I hear that’s good money too!!”

My mother looked at me with a mixture of exasperation, disgust, confusion and annoyance
“That’s not the same thing”... she calmly retorted (cool as ever...all the while I dare say, saying a quick prayer for her dear daughter’s virtue... and verbal stupidity ) lol I love my mum
I felt I went too far :)... needed her to know I was happy in my career.. went down the legislation route..
“We’ve got laws against that kind of thing now mum, it’s not accepted for people to behave in that way... they don’t’ have to take it!”

I know it’s a generational thing... and I understand where my mum is coming from... it's knowledge based on real lived experience

We ended on kind of an agreement
Agreed that I felt it was a form of selling yourself, and that perhaps ...I still clearly have a lot to learn...

***
Which brings me on to a not totally unrelated subject. That is... how much money it would take for you to denounce your heritage?... your ethnicity?... your culture?
Would you?... could you? put a price on it?..

Okay here’s the thing...
I say this because... I'm looking at what I’ve theoretically called the ‘normative 'racial' ladder of success’...
(I’m still working on this)

Low pay [colour/’race’ is important]
Higher pay colour ‘race’ a factor... but not important!]
Very well paid colour/’race’ non- existent/not a factor at all]
What price? and why?
Is it possible that the more BMEs earn the more we become afraid of the repercussions, impacts and effects of racism... e.g the more you have... the more there is to lose?

Is racism best tackled from the top down ( as in government policies)
or ( and I don't much like this phrase.) bottom up?.. as in the majority/citizens?

Football.. football football..yawn....oh.. and racism charges

Did Kenny Dalglish, really tweet...'very disappointed with today's verdict. This is the time when Suarez needs our full support!. Let's not let him walk alone. KD'

Well... I'm tempted to say I'm a little dissapointed in you too KD!

Now I don't know much about Suarez.. but I do know that when I saw a photo of him this morning..I wondered how on earth he could possibly racially abuse a black player, because... he looked kinda black to me!!

Has he done a background check?..does he know his roots?... what's going on?



Maybe it was my TV...

Anyway.. seems he's been found guilty of racially abusing a black player, and John Terry... has been officially charged.
If John Terry is found guilty ( I'm possibly going to be very unpopular for saying this but..) he should not be allowed to remain England's captain.. period
there.. I said it..

Why did they take the job away from Rio? wasn't he the captain awhile back..



Pretty sure you've picked up I'm not particularly impressed with a number of footballers/ their antics, and in some cases the racist yobs that follow them around

Here's a question .. why racism in football?.. why not boxing, kickboxing or karate?.. :)

A Dennis Brown - the Paragons & Alton Ellis mix..

The Dennis Brown track led me on a search of the paragons version which I couldn't find.. but found a few other gems..

My search ended with some classic Alton Ellis..













Rough Sleepers...

Chilled Leo mentioned recently in one of her comments/posts how hard it must be for rough sleepers at this time with the weather being so cold , and today on the news I was shocked to hear that the average life expectancy for a rough sleeper is 47. I also heard a figure of 43 mentioned ( not sure if that's for men or women)
How sad is that?

The governments cap on housing benefit will not help families, but instead may put an enormous strain on those already struggling financially who need support.. not punishment.

Just thought I'd mention that I looked up life expectancy in the Congo and found that for men it's 53 and for women 56

In Somalia for men it's 48 and for women 52.
My choice of selection was purely because we know them as countries that have experience long term, serious civil conflicts.
Yet... they're outliving rough sleepers right here in the 'wealthy and democratic west'

Back to the UK... the bedrock of any community is family.. and families are not always blood related.. but the concept of great family is one of care , nurturing, guidance, support, encouragement belief, and a strong desire to aid its members in reaching thier full potential... love.

If the 'success' of any country could be measured by the number of rough sleepers, or, people living in poverty.. I fear we are not doing as well as we may hope, or like .. 'our' focus is on economic health and well being, and not perhaps unfortunately.. what really matters... people

So amazing.. Luther Vandross..:)x

Tuesday 20 December 2011

Plimsolls vs Vans...

Can anyone remember the classic white plimsolls of the '70s?... Did your parents used to buy them ?..send you off to school with brand new plimsolls, have you feeling 'top of the world' all day

That brand new plimsoll smell



Pick them up cheap I’m sure but it wasn't about the money... they were nice!!
I had several pairs, and I also used to have this white paint/paste thing that anytime my plimsolls got a bit dirty I'd wash them... dry them..then re paint them white including the laces... yeah...Krissss:)

Now why is it when I try to talk to some youths about 'Vans' they don't want to hear...?.. refuse to see the resemblance even?



Vans are not cheap.. and they are not being repainted either...
Yet to me... they just remind me of 70s plimsolls...
What gives?

ft Sylvia Tella



I have always loved this song Ms Tella:)



Cool track...

Gruffalo moments:)...

A few weeks back I bought the Gruffalo and the Gruffalo's Child books for my grandson. We've since read it together several times and he enjoys it very much.
But this post is not really about the Gruffalo... or ‘bubba’ ( bless his cotton socks)
It’s about life.
I'll explain... but to do so , I need to return briefly to the Gruffalo:)



You see... I thought I knew what the book was about. I was sure I‘d read the story many times as a child, as an adult ... until I knew it backwards... just as I know Little Red Riding Hood or the Three Little Pigs.
It wasn’t until I sat down and read it that it dawned on me... I didn’t know the story at all!
What I knew was,...the legend of the Gruffalo, the myth... hear say... to the point where I had constructed a story around it, sure it was the real deal...

And I find that life, at times... is not much different.
There are times when I think I know something, sure of how something will turn out, confident I have a measure on this thing, when all of a sudden, I’ll turn a page... and blam!?!... I’ll be faced with something I’ve not only never been faced with before, but didn’t even see coming.




Life is a page turner. To be lived not through myth or hearsay... not to be lived through the lens of others...but through the reality of what truly is... your reality... and that can be a truly joyous thing

If I were to coin a phrase... I may be tempted to call the unexpected... a real 'Gruffalo moment'

Monday 19 December 2011

Ray..



Is 'slopping out' a breach of a prisoner's human rights?...

Without going into too much detail, 'slopping out' is where prisoners use buckets as toilets which are emptied at a certain time every day. Banned as far as I’m aware but still in place in certain old prisons in the country.
I stumbled across an article in which prisoner had taken a jail to court for using the practice. He claimed that some prisoners were not even using the bucket, rather newspapers on cell floors, then throwing whatever was collated out the window which was inhumane

I personally feel it's possible that the best form of rehabilitation is kindness, with discipline and a re-education (or education) thrown into the mix. Why?... well .. because there are some people who have never had an ounce of kindness or compassion shown to them in their entire lives, and as a result seethe with anger, and have little or no idea how to express love, kindness, or compassion themselves.

'No.. slopping out' is not cool..
So, I'm all for a more healing approach...although I'm aware there are times when it may be too little, too late.

The only odd thing about the claim... (which the judge ruled against by the way) was the crime that the man allegedly committed. Anyone who is aware of human rights that commits a crime that blatantly abuses/breaches the human rights of another is on a bit of a slippery slope.

You can read the story here

For you... ft Monica

For every loss
There is a gain
For tears shed
Battles fought
and overcome
In the midst of confusion
where understanding is sort
and found
Through painful healing
To stand alone
To know despair
As a solider returns from battle
into the arms of loved ones
When memories fade
only to resurface
Where there is healing
there will always be..
grace
humility
and love

Sunday 18 December 2011

Dr West on courage...



On selfishness



On race/culture...an older interview yet still relevant..interesting

At a crossroads.. in more ways than one..ft Morgan Heritage..

Where do we go from here?..
Now there's a question..

Inspired I guess by this song, by recent conversations and blog posts.. a theme seems to be emerging in it's many varieties, and that's being at a crossroads.

I recently blogged about weaves and black hair. looked at things from both sides.. ish.
Now I often feel that women really are the backbone/s of nations. Women are often gifted with amazing insight and intuition ( often unrealised in themselves) and in ways that are often overlooked. They are 'the bedrock of families across the globe)

My brother drives.. but as his car had broken down he had to get the bus. He said to me not that long ago that not one black woman who came on to the bus had their own hair on display.. ( and no.. it was not covered by any form of religious apparel)

I like to feel that as a woman I understand women.. to a point.
However, I do not wonder why so many of us do not like our own hair...do not feel our own hair is beautiful enough to be seen in public.
I understand it on many levels

I'll throw in an odd observational statistic and say that 8 out of 10 adult women wear weaves of some other 'self altering' head gear.

This is not a judgement .. or a critisism...just an observation

However, if we as women do not see the beauty in our own natural selves, or in our culture.. who else will?.. and how will, or could that self negation impact on our family structures or 'communities'

Chilled Leo recently said that even if Beyonce performed 'weave less' she would still be as popular'
To be honest that's one of those hypothetical claims ( I often make) that can't really be answered.
One thing I would say on that is, some of those 'head flicking' dance moves would have to change:))..

Remember Lauryn Hill? It's my personal view that one of the aspects of Lauryn's popularity was not only her amazing soul filled/pain filled voice.. but her naturalness... her natural appearance... her hair.
It was... re-fre-shing!!
Truth is ladies.. the world can see your.. or our beauty
But often.. we fail to see it in ourselves..
So... just where do we go.. from 'hair'

Enjoy what inspired this post...
Morgan Heritage Happy SMSx

disclaimer.. this post is not referring to anyone with a medical condition or 'problems' with their hair

/em>

Is jamaican Patois corrupted English?...mi no no.. but yo.. unu warn read di bible?..

Is a patois Bible 'dumming down' the bible?
It's an interesting question
check out the conversation on radio 4 here

Racism and discourse is a long standing issue
Language used as a tool to divide and conquer...to support hierarchies... for some nations/cultures to maintain dominance over another...

I remember back in the day as a child born in the UK if any of us (my siblings) spoke in a Caribbean dialect, we were told off and told to speak correctly.. and so... being the good ahem non- mischievous children we were .. lol we'd do it anyway and more..
Seriously.. back then, in order to assimilate (for many)it was important to try not to stand out too much.. 'black dialects' were often seen as ‘less than’ or ‘less intelligent’, and parents who wanted their children to get along and do well, would not encourage such blatant displays of 'blackness'
When you think about it... we haven't really moved on that much.. have we?
What else do minority cultures suppress in order to assimilate, what else could be perceived as a blatant expression of 'blackness'

Yet, surely multiculturalism is about being able to express your differences in an environment that welcomes and benefits from such cultural diversity.
Or is the way forward..as many now believe... assimilation?
Much of the un-surety I believe now resides deep within our psyches’
Like a dialectical cultural turmoil

I've strayed off point a bit I know
I'll be honest and say that the patois Bible makes me laugh.. I can't help it..( I have a silly sense of humour!) I find it comical, expressive yes, but I feel like I'm listening to an Oliver Samuel's play..
Gosh I'm just so British sometimes

Still not sure?.. well listen again here

Like most things.. it's not really about the Bible at all... is it?

'Love'...1 Corinthians

Love can be tough
Our search for it
Finding it
Giving it
Receiving it
Managing it
Understanding it
But once we know it and accept it
Be... love, do... love
Perhaps then, confusion ceases to be

For my Soulmate Sunday post today I wanted to share a verse ( from the bible) with you. Not because it's from the bible, but because I've always liked it; for it's beauty, and ability to comfort.. it is...

1 Corinthians

1 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.


Brrrr..It's cold outside.. wrap up warm..Happy SMSx

Saturday 17 December 2011

Miles Davis..

I can't tell you how long I've searched for this piece of music..
I'm so pleased to have found it
It's beautiful..



and another..

Plan B

No not this singer.. more like .. the alternative choice.. you know..the backup!!

Is it ever okay to tell a person they should lower their expectations?.
Like, for example..a chap whose barely worked a day In his life but wants a job that pays 'big bucks' as some would say
Isn't it encouraging that despite a persons current circumstances they still aspire to want better for themselves and their families?
Do unrealistic expectations hinder or help?
People are capable of amazing things.. and can and in many cases do, change their lives for the better; the ex junkie.. you name it.. people have come to a cross roads in their life and taken a road that can can totally transform it..leaving non- believers stunned in their wake..



I would feel awful telling anyone they should lower their expectations... so I don't.
I do believe in having a plan B though..



A plan B is something I'd advocate to anyone really..
Some say why stop at B..
Having a plan B can is a bit like having a life jacket in stormy waters
So keep those expectations close I say.. and your plan B even closer..

A song for Reggie..



Hope it's the right one :))

Peter & Christopher Hitchens..

I quite like Peter Hitchens.
I may not agree with all of what he says, but that doesn't matter to me.
He's an intelligent man, forthright, with a world view that quite often makes a lot of sense.
Some say he's harsh but I don't find him harsh at all.

I mentioned this to someone once and they looked at me in disgust/confusion... as if to inquire.. 'how could I!?!'
Well... I can and I do.
I'm not one to be overtly swayed by public opinion, and often find that when the majority follow a certain path.. it can be best to carve your own..

This may seem an odd introduction to what I want to talk about.. and that's Eulogies.. but it's not really..

You see ( although I don't know them) I was quite saddened to hear of the death of Peter's brother Christopher. I was intrigued as to why for many years they didn't get on.. but it can be tough when opinions differ greatly.

However, having a contrasting world view to someone else, does not mean there is an absence of love.
I read Peter's blog ( as I often do) and thought, how difficult and strange it all must be, dealing with private emotions in public

This got me thinking about Eulogies. I watched a film once when a man who knew he was about to die, organised and attended his own funeral.
He got to hear what was said about him, what people really thought of him, and how much he would be missed.
A Eulogy for the living.. why not?
A person, in knowing how much they were truly loved.. would surely rest in peace then..

*****

Not an eulogy, but quite a profound interview with Paxman
He spoke very candidly about his illness

Close to the end of this interview - it's almost as if he wasn't really an atheist..
Just reluctant, and refusing, to believe the word of man perhaps
Whilst it's true his words could have offended many.. ( for example in my mind it's not appropriate to criticize the faith or religion of another, and to mock it even worse.. for there is much good, and healing to be found in the faiths if you seek it) if you choose not to be offended and read between the lines he was at the very least, a very interesting man

Thursday 15 December 2011

Van Morrison & Al Green..it's nice to be serenaded..

'I've been searching' for a song to keep me company whilst I drag my fingers over the keys to complete a piece of work for tomorrow, whilst trying very hard to hold back the urge to be a little wild and have a really good time.
I've had a lot on over the past few weeks.. in fact, If I were honest... much- much longer , so I feel I deserve a little break

There are a few tunes that can really mellow me out and this is one of them
*love the photos*



This is another one..
One of my 'wedding songs'.. in my head anyway ( to be honest.. I have a track list lol.. doesn't everyone!?!)
Maybe I'll just write it into a script or something
This song has kept me company all week.. thank you Al Green..
Anyway.. better get on with it..

Tuesday 13 December 2011

Nigel Farage again:) in.. 'the great escape'..

Did he say .. a snarling Sarkozy??.. did he call them non entities?
Well.. even if Nick Clegg's not happy with Cameron's actions of late.. I think Mr Farage is mighty pleased!!.. he looks like he's having a great time!
Who'd have thought it..

I love Christmas songs... I really do:)..they are so romantic.. filled with hope and love..

Songs from old movies.. songs from the greats... as they were, or updated..
I don't care.. I just love them..
Just like I love fairy lights, Christmas trees, naff crackers, baileys and those savory snacks you wouldn't even sniff any other time of year..

Re runs of the same movies I've seen year after year.. White Christmas, Magnificent Seven, Babe, Shrek, some old Doris Day movie, or that plasticine animated man and his dog whose name escapes me!.. any movie will do really
A slow dance in the living room, and more stuffing and sprouts, than anyone could ever possibly manage..
I wonder why things seem to taste better in boxes all of a sudden.. biscuits and chocolates..
and why dinner tastes better by candlelight...
I often wonder why the heck people have to pack so much into their trolleys, and why I always seem to shop at the last minute..
I really like and enjoy cooking for others.. and having folks around for dinner..it's fun
But most of all....
I love Christmas songs..

























Oh Yes.. this selection pleases me :))
Loving you allx

Monday 12 December 2011

When is a 'fro just a 'fro?..

In the 1960s the Afro became a symbol of the civil rights movement both in the United States, & right here in the UK
A political, and cultural statement
To some ..a symbol of resistance
To this day it's often called.. Afrocentric
Afrocentric.. but it's just hair right?



Black hair has an interesting symbolic history
Styles can often reflect more than just fashion
It can also be an indicator of much more..
An external expression of an internal obsession?
(perhaps... or perhaps I just enjoy a line that rhymes:))



Politically, and historically, just wearing your hair naturally and not battling with the lye(relaxer), was an indication of a people at ease with themselves, and wanting equal rights.. to be treated as equals.. not subhuman under some messed up Jim Crow laws
A recognition that beauty was not under the copyright of white America

Young men in the UK who sported an afro , or grew locks.. gained self respect - but lost jobs...ironically, too long without a job, and that self respect gained could become but a distant memory




Malcolm X's autobiography tells an interesting tale of when he decided to relinquish the 'zoot suits' and 'slicked back hair'
It was a lifestyle change not without substantial cultural and political significance



One which helped to pave a way for the 'freedom of self expression' we enjoy today?
That's if we really do enjoy 'freedom of self expression' today..



As I reflected briefly on the history of hair, one style sprang to mind. It did so because I never see it anymore.. and growing up.. I did..



Is it ever just a 'fro?
Sure.. but it's a 'fro with a rich cultural history and rich tradition..

Sunday 11 December 2011

Has the weave done more for race relations than the Race Relations Act ever could?

Black women get a lot of stick at times over their wearing of 'weaves'. so ... I'm going to defend them.
Firstly, black and white women wear weaves ( just thought I'd get that out of the way)

The main difference is that, the weaves that black women wear are mainly Asian or European in appearance.
Why not 'Afro hair' weaves you say?.. well... hang on...

This has enabled black women to attend work, colleges, universities, etc without being asked silly questions about their hair, without being ostracised, without the odd looks...for looking...well... different.

You see... the weave has helped to put at ease those who may have felt/ or feel, a little uneasy with a more natural black/African appearance.
The wearing of the European or Asian weave has lessened the cultural ethnic gap, and ensured that the image is one which is recognisable and acceptable to the mainstream.

Beyonce, is a fine example (beautiful as she is) of the power of the weave.
the power to remove that which may cause unease.

I've had a few guys say they're not into the image so much anymore.. I asked why, and the response was... well.. errr..the image... and something to do with now appearing (like Rhianna and Kelly R_much lighter in complexion than before).. they felt the message to young black girls could be counterproductive..producing within them..a negative self image

But, that's another argument.. ish

My thing is... don't knock the weave.
It ain't so easy for black men to mask their 'blackness'... and somebody's gotta bring home the bacon.

Question is.. do they realise the contribution?

Racism = Hate?.. not always..

There are people who think and say they can't be racist because..
"
I just love Beyonce
Think Barack Obama's great
I have a black neighbour
My sisters married to a black man
I've got mixed race people in my family
I once dated a black girl
I once dated a black man
I think Rihanna's hot
ditto Denzel Washington
I love rap and reggae
I like the Caribbean
I've been to Africa on holiday
I was against apartheid
I've had equalities training
I've eaten curry goat and rice
Rice and peas ( see above)"

This can be quite an exhaustive list...
but the truth is... you can

because racism isn't always about hate

If anyone finds themselves in a quandary over this.. that's okay.. maybe there are some questions we should ask ourselves every now and then, if we want to eradicate racism and racist attitudes..
like how?.. or why?.. or what's the difference between?..

Redefining 'whiteness' in multicultural London..

I had a conversation with a man in the week who said he was an ethnic minority.
He's white.
I'm paraphrasing here but he basically went on to say he understood the plight of ethnic minorities because he's an ethnic minority in his own area.
I asked him where he lived and he explained that he lives in a predominately Asian ... Bangladeshi area in East London

I wanted to ask him what made that area 'his own' but didn't want to agitate him.. I understood what he meant, but I also picked up an underlying resentment in what he said.. and how he said it.
In this context I feel I cannot accept his claim to ethnicminoritydom.
No.
Whilst he may feel like an 'ethnic minority' in a square mile, in reality, he resides in the 'dominant majority' section in the UK.. I'll be specific .. London.

He has no idea what 'ethnic minorities' have to deal with, and I was a bit disgusted at his desire to cry fowl play.. yet oddly intrigued.

He made me consider for a moment the dominant minority and the minority rule governments of Zimbabwe and South Africa..
Now that was some messed up stuff.. backed by the British Government ( but I don't want to stray down that road.. this evening)

There are parts of London where the white population do feel subjugated by 'culturally dominant minorities'.. but to be honest in those cases other minority groups are also often excluded alongside.. .and to be fair, it can be an issue.

Still, the use of the term ethnic minority remains a useful tool in the fight against racism, if only as a means of identification; and racism, is experienced far more by people from Black and Asian backgrounds...

In short, In London, a white man is not an ethnic minority. Nice try. but no.

Con-Dem Nation..

You're damned if you do - you're damned if you don't
Nothing suits that old maxim better than the business of politics.

I think as a leader you're never going to please everyone..
even if you're not in a leadership role.. it's highly unlikely; however I want to focus on David Cameron for a minute.. and what I see as 'the EU debacle'..

I know there are those who have called for a referendum in the past, but to be honest, asking the public for their opinion on this may be a bit like asking what Miss Brown is cooking Joe White for dinner.. or what's the shoe size of the man in the dry cleaners?... you know the one.. down the road from the street with no name!?!...( what??.. who they heck are these people!?!)
My point is.. I don't think the public know enough about what the heck is being played out with regards to the EU and how it may or may not affect them to be able to make a decision either way... well I can't speak for everyone..( even if I often try:)) but I know that I really don't know enough

Putting aside 'the public' for a mo..
Our political leaders are so divided on this it's crazy

I was wondering where Peter Mandelson was of late.. then up popped this article in the Guardian

A divided leadership cannot preside over a united nation.. can it?
Brings new meaning to the word Condemnation

Beres Hammond..and a Stingray 'Caution riddim' back 2 back version X



I was in the car last night and the DJ played a few versions of this tune ... and how nice it was... there are those evenings when you just feel London's one cool place to be..( I would have probably said that wherever I was.. music can do that to you.. everything seems brighter)
Enjoy this chilly SMS.. at least it's warm inside..

Music to prepare Sunday lunch to..
*Big hugs*






Prince Malachi - One of the UK's finest reggae singers..



Queen of reggae

Friday 9 December 2011

Cheeky..

Yes.. hands up.. I confess
I can be cheeky
but then.. isn't everybody?
Beggar came up to me the other day ( to be honest I thought I knew him.. it was only after asking him how things were going, and him looking confused that I realised I didn't know him at all and he just wanted money!!)damn..
He asked for £1.. I happened to have £1 in my hand.. gave it to him
he looked at it.. looked at me..then asked for more...
I asked him if he wanted to give me back my £1.. he walked away

who was cheeky... me or him?

I can't help being a bit cheeky sometimes.. it's just in me
people are funny

Being Shy

If I say I'm shy no one believes me..
seriously.. no one

I don't really say it anymore because if I do I'll be told..
"No you're not!.. no way!"..
Basically .. I'm accused of being a liar.. as apparently.. people know me better than I know myself!
It used to tick me off a bit
But then it would right?.. if you are constantly being mis judged.
Still.. I'm used to it now..
Now.. I can pretty much play any role you like..
you want tough, i can be tough... want cute i can be cute.. want quiet i can be quiet.. whatever..
People pretty much believe what they like

If i were to describe being shy, I would call it.. experiencing physical and mental pain in the company of others..

It's a feeling of being totally exposed.. as if all the eyes of the world are on you at that particular moment, you're not ready, and their eyes chip away at your soul..
To be honest.. it's really hard to describe..
Which is what makes it difficult for others to understand I think

Here's a definition that I think does a good job

As a child I had a terrible fear of people..
As I got older. lord have mercy I was picked for everything!.. I think one reason may have been because.. (at that time) i was quite cute with these long plaits.. and I remember one day, the headteacher asked me to present something to some 'dignitary ' or another at this large 'special' assembly.. shit... I remember it like it was yesterday...
that was the longest walk to the stage.. the ribbons in my hair were big, and red..
(matched my favourite polka-dot red with white trim dress my mum made) and i just wanted them to scoop me up and get me the heck outta there..

Oddly enough... I love both stages.. and audiences now
Yes.. i am weird.

Count yourself lucky if you're not shy though.. it can be unpleasant .. and very odd

Confidence..

There are times when I've thought.. there are two types of people in this world..
those who are confident.. and those who are not..
I used to think you can spot them easily.. there they are..the confident ones

They run the country.. run businesses, run their lives the way they want, take charge, and get things done..
But that's not necessarily true..
Those who 'run things' are not necessarily any more confident than anyone else.. they just get things done..
For the purpose of this post lets just call them 'starter finishers'..
They start something - and they finish it.
They're not quitters
They see things through to the end.. they are resilient, they have focus, and if at first they don't succeed, they try again.. sometimes they change tact.. but they try again

I'm quite fortunate in the work that I do that I get to meet lots of people from all types of backgrounds..
and in life in general.. people tend to talk to me about all manner of things... I really appreciate that.. they are so open with me, and I respect that.. as they have taught me much..

Confidence is a funny thing...
It's easily eroded.. and over time, a lack of it can really be a barrier to achieving what you truly desire in life..

I meet amazing people who tell me they're not confident.. and it baffles me
Then I meet those who appear confident yet are riddled with insecurities..
I meet some who manipulate those who lack confidence in order to get their own way and I've watched those who lack confidence...let them!
Quite a sad reality really..

In my 'space' I feel very confident ( i'll always be shy..but confident)
outside of my own space.. I'm less sure. This, I think is because whilst I know and trust my motives...I can never be sure of the motives of another... so I may feel uneasy
That feeling we get is what we sometimes confuse with lacking confidence
Feeling uneasy is not necessarily anything to do with confidence
But paradoxically confidence can help to over come that uneasy feeling.

Can you teach confidence?
Not sure..I'm not convinced you can
I think it's important to unearth the root cause/s.. for a person to understand why they feel the way they do..

Sometimes it stems from childhood experiences.. other times it's a series of unfortunate events, lack of meaningful friendships/relationships.. abuse.. you name it..
Personally, I believe that feeling good about yourself is a deeply spiritual process
Getting to know yourself well.. and being honest with yourself, is a great starting point

In the words of Bob Marley.. 'you're running and you're running.. but you can't run away from yourself!

Feelings..

Not heard this in a while

Jackie Mittoo..

Met Jackie way back in an east london studio at 15.
When he sat behind the keyboard it was amazing to watch..
He was a very gifted musician.. reggae music legend..

Thought of the day - Euro..

I'm not feeling the Euro..
I don't think it's just because I'm not European, but that may have something to do with my dissonance..
Race relations has been a hard enough slog right here in the UK, and our European 'brothers and sisters' are wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy behind in that department methinks..
( *Good luck to the black players in the England football team for Euro 2012)
I digress
I am a Brit after all.. and there are ( what I think may be ) benefits to the European union..
Still, I don't think 'we' can realistically stay out of the Euro for much longer..

It would mean letting go of key powers and control but that's already begun hasn't it..

A one world government is the agenda.. it's not really if.. but when..


* it's already been reported that racism is a major concern, but they're ploughing ahead anyway... any country who fans express that level of hostility should not be hosting.. or really be allowed to partake perhaps.. what say you?

Memories of Luciano, Xterminator, and yes.. TGIFx

I've enjoyed Luciano's music for so many years now..

With the passing of Phillip 'Fatis' Burrell of Xtermintor record label I began to think about the artists/singers he's worked with.. and Luciano sprung to mind 1st.
With that, I thought about the 1st track I really took notice of from Luci.. It was this one.. It's not off the Xterminator label but it's conjures up a certain time.. and it was shortly after that Luci began to work with Xterminator..

Of all the many tracks that Luciano has out there... I will always say this one for me.. it my Fav..
It's so simple.. has an innocence to it... and really kick started his career in the UK... In my world anyway :)it just stuck... all these years later... it just stuck

Hold on to you dreams... TGIFx

Tuesday 6 December 2011

Who protects the poor?..

It was quite recently that someone told me they felt the deficit was as a result of welfare benefits, and I've lost count of the number of times that people have said things along the lines of .. those on benefits are better off than those of us who work!?!..
When I ask "how so?" .. they usually go on to say things like.. oh well they can afford wide screen TVs, car outside, blah blah blah.. some 'nonsense' like that.

I often wonder what it is about wide screen TVs that is such an annoyance to some folk, and think it's possibly become some kind of symbol of status for the middle classes (I don't know) but people keep bringing it up - what gives?

Maybe what's needed is some kind of UK poverty tour..

Or.. the inequality tour
We're a very divided nation..

Monday 5 December 2011

Jamie Foxx 'heads up' some old skl love songs... ft Barry White..plus more



Now... going way back in time..







An evening with Dr Cornel West..The catastrophe of success ..An examined life..inside the mind of...

I just love Dr West..
To share a NY cab.. and talk.. hang out..now that would be cool..yep..that would really make my day...
Great mind
Hope you too enjoy my version of.. an evening with.. :)





Sunday 4 December 2011

Gappy Ranks - West Indian Girl..+2




Sweet Love..



Peace & Joy..





I haven't heard Maxi Priest for a long time..

Not that shallow..

Sometimes I say things... often in jest and I suspect it may leave some people thinking... gosh... she’s a bit shallow!?!
So just to (sort of) set the record straight I’ll just say...
I know that getting married is not all about the dress (and whether or not I look nice in it)



I know a man doesn’t have to be cute or handsome to be a ‘good man’
I also know that having a ‘wealthy’ partner doesn’t mean he will take care of me



I absolutely know good sex is not all about length and girth (esp. girth)
I know if he wears his ring it doesn’t mean he’ll be faithful
Just as I know that giving him the best ‘sex in the world’ won’t stop him from straying either
I know nice shoes are just ‘nice shoes’
I know not all neoliberals, are c***suckers
I also know that that can’t really be used a curse word... can it!?!Lol
I know that if a guy lets’ me down 1nce... It may be a bit harsh to dump him
I know that thin lips don’t always signify a lying tongue; just as joined up eyebrows.. can be parted!
I know that not all short men have that ‘napoleon complex’..



I know that not all intelligent men are smart
I know that if he says no to me once.. it doesn’t necessarily mean he hates me (therefore should be dumped)
I also know that honestly may be more important than fidelity (although a breach of either one may be the end)

I’ve been accused of being too fussy when it comes to my partners etc.. when truth is I’m not.. no more than anyone else I should think anyway... I could pick anyone of these, but I’m gonna go back to the dress and say... if I actually agree to marry anyone, believe me when I say it’s because he’s absolutely incredible to me...( in the most un-shallow way) so yes.. (ironically) I feel can be as shallow as I like at that point... so, if and when the day arises... I would like to look nice in my dress (only gonna do it 1nce.. if at all to be honest, as I may be going off the idea... :)

Have a lovely day
Happy SMSx

Saturday 3 December 2011

Blogging..pt 1

I enjoy talking about most things..
I also enjoy silence
There are things I don't talk about at all.. instead, I just keep them stowed away in my mind.. that area we mark private and confidential I guess..

I remember when I started this blog, it was ole years night..( approaching 2011)
Don't ask me what I was doing then but I vaguely remember watching a Take That concert on the box ..

I never really gave it much thought other than.. I love to write.. I have things to say.. and I want to share my thoughts..
I guess in some way I wanted to warm myself up for my larger projects.. test the waters a bit and see what it would be like if I had my own newspaper or magazine column.. I don't know really..
I think also.. I was alone at the time.. felt alone.. so it was also like having a trusted friend..someone to confide in.

I have always enjoyed writing.. and for as long as I can remember I've had an opinion on something..
sure...you may agree with some... others you wont.. but that's okay.. we learn a great deal from each other I think.. well at least I do.. (learn from you..)

I never thought I would become as attached to my blog as I have become.. I also didn't realise how therapeutic It could be..
Writing, for writers, is something you just have to do.. It's like therapy it really is..

There are times when I've been able to make sense of my feelings just by writing them down and sharing them..
My emotions often spill out onto the page, but again.. that's pretty normal for me..

And then there are the blogs I follow
Each one unique.. entertaining, enlightening, insightful, artistic, creative, funny, and with the ability to cheer me up on a low day..

Blogging is my love of words on a page.. and more.. good and bad it's a reflection of me, my likes and loves, my annoyances, my hopes, my journey if you like..
Yet funny thing is.. even if a guy (for example) wanted to know about me and read my blog... it still wouldn't be all..

I look forward to my 1st year Blogger anniversary:).. thanks for sharing with me:)

A light hearted look at stereotypes...

Discussed stereotypes last week with someone, and was asked.. is it a stereotype if it's true?
e.g Nigerian Barber shops are very noisy compared to an English Barber.. truth or stereotype?
English food is quite bland in taste compared to Indian food.. truth, or stereotype?

Stereotypes can be positive or negative that's for sure.. tricky very tricky
btw..Just what is that 'obsession' with Chicken?

Are 'internal' stereotypes different to 'external' ones?.. or are they just as ( if not more) damaging?

Maybe issues occur when the terms .. are all.. or always.. are used to accentuate a point or belief..
as it's not possible for a group of people to all be a certain way.. or always anything.. is it?

Beyond Borders - Community Channel TV

This is apparently the documentary that inspired the film The Fighter.. ( in which Christian Bale won an Oscar for)

As sad a documentary as it is, it's also quite compelling.. very moving. If anyone was ever unsure about the ways the drugs can ruins lives.. this documentary couldn't make it any clearer..
It's called Beyond Borders - High on Crack Street - available on the Community Channel(warning - features scenes of drug use)
I haven't seen the film with Christian Bale but I would really like to see it now
Drug abuse can seriously ruin lives.. that's for sure

Thursday 1 December 2011

Little Bubz 'n' N-Dubz....

My little grandson is 2. He'll be 3 next year.
He's very cute and funny.. love it when he calls me..Nanny.. .or Nanny Dawna, I feel so grown up and wise ( haha.. I wish... silly really, but true..it's nice)

Anyway.. I had him a couple of weeks ago, and he just kept singing this tune.. over and over.. on the bus.. on the street..I couldn't quite make it out..so I asked ...What you singing Buba?!?( that's not his name btw:)

"Dappy!" he said loud and clear..
" I laughed my head off!"... Oh yeah.. "no wee gwets!!"..not even 3yrs old, and a big big Dappy & N-Dubz fan

How did he learn this stuff so young!?!.. I wonder if he'll remember.. hehe.. never mind.. maybe I'll remind him

I ended up quite liking the tune myself

Welcome December..

Wow..It's the 1st of December.. already!!

So...the season is upon us
Fairy lights and early nightsx

crazy, sexy, cool

I love this time of year
It's the time of year of heightened emotions, joy, sadness, reflection, and dreams..
I'm an emotional girl me... bubbling away under there:)
Carried on a cloud of dreams.. to whereever, whenever
( don't worry , I haven't had a glass..)

December.

It announces the end of one year, and beckons forth the beginning of another..
And boy...what a year it has been!!..
Still... there are weeks to go before the tear filled ole years night shenanegans... So I wont rush ahead of myself

Oddly enough I've become accustomed to the cold also..
Kinda like that too now..

It's the time to begin to tie up loose ends.. plant new seeds maybe bury some old ones.. Closures and new beginnings
I hope this month brings joy to all...
And as you begin to reflect on the year, lessons learnt etc, I hope you can celebrate the fact that you made it through... older, yet more youthful...and wiser.. and i'm sure .. more loved than ever before:)
( whether you know it or not!)

If you could have one thing in your stocking this year ... what would it be?

I'm still loving this tune... can't get enough..
It's warm inside... so why not turn it up and enjoy :)x

Give up on people?... me?.. nah..not really.. not deep down..

I have noticed something quite wonderful about people, and it’s this

In the face of great suffering and despair, they can be at their most compassionate
When all else fails and only they remain
They can be at their most honest
As intended by nature
Stripped bare of the cloak, the armour, the shied, you will find love
They remain.. with humour...
and possibly...
a cup of tea
There is always hope..the song of the hopeless
And they should know
So I don’t give up on people,
Not really,
Not deep down

An 80's moment.. ft Sade

Nice song...still..

Bird & Fortune.. funny..





Wednesday 30 November 2011

Thought of the evening.. Etons finest...

Question/s of the evening... exactly where is 'our money?'...no really..
Where will the UKs economic growth spring from?... and...
Just what is the date of the next election anyway...

Our current mess is not a great advert for an over £30,000 per year education..

Gosh... what gives...

I think therefore I am...

Someone asked me today if I saw the youtube clip of the lady on the tram in Croydon cursing the 'blacks' and the 'Poles' etc...
I said yes.. and we had a little giggle about it.. then we stopped giggling when we asked each other about the comments that accompanied it...

Wow.. there are some deep rooted issues out there.. not one or two.. but many...

Trams and trains.. go figure...

There was a woman on the train this evening laughing hysterically, real gut wrenching laughter, so much so I couldn't help but laugh too ( behind me bag..)
Laughter is infetcous..
Anyway.. I digress...
I wonder what life would be like if we all said what we really thought..
If we spoke freely about the things that reside on our minds..
Gave an honest answer to an honest question...

I wonder if we would witness an increase of trust and respect...mutual understanding
or.... if total anarchy would ensue...

I think about a lot of things...
some things are reoccurring... many things are...
I wonder what my thoughts say about me..

I think , therefore I am.....

Strike 1..

I was going to say something along the lines of...
'Around a third of those people out there striking over these f'in pensions possibly wont live to see much of the bastard anyway'... but I decided that may be a bit harsh.. and possibly incorrect... so I wont

There is a serious point to that display of what's oddly known as black humour and it's this...
Life is what happens when you're busy making plans....
Live in the now..

Strike 2
I suspect a large number of people on strike today arn't actually doing as badly as they may think..

Many will have jobs (that goes without saying given the nature of the strike I guess)... own at least 1 home.. own at least one car.. and holiday every year... sometimes... thrice..
Compare that to those without jobs.. struggling to pay their bills.. heat their homes.. buy food... can't afford a pension... struggling to keep a roof over their heads...buy clothes
In that light... things must look rather different right?...

So whilst some may say that today was one of the the largest displays of worker solidarity seen in the UK for some time..
One could also argue it was in fact one of the largest displays of utter selfishness...

What's that I hear some folk say.. cut welfare.. just don't cut my pension..

Strike 3 aka .. how to spend a strike day...
Option 1 - a.m - Get up early, get washed and dressed..go out..stand around in the cold, shout a bit, buy a coffee..march a bit... and go home

or...
Option 2 - a.m - Stay in bed... watch TV... eat cheese and cracker's whilst enjoying a glass of red..
in the warmth...

Hmmmm... wonder what the majority did..

Just so you know.. I'm not anti strike...absolutely not..
I'm not sure but perhaps there's something about this particular that's grating on me.. ( just a tiny bit.. I'm yet to fully comprehend what it is..)

Don't get it twisted... I get the argument.. I really do.. and yeah yeah. the bankers the corp's the govt.. yes...but... still, there's a human story running parallel to this.. that is just as important...if not more so..

Happy days..Happy coalition days..

Did I strike?...

Anyway.. hoping for a Uturn.. who wants to work in their old age eh?.. 'You give your more to receive your less' as Marley would say...
I have a feeling that some people have become accustomed to it.. still I know.. it doesn't make it right

Feel free to tell me off:)
Up the workers?..

Sunday 27 November 2011

Toni B







Stevie Wonder Selection.. Loves in need.. Happy SMSx







Some interesting clips..



It's a close call.. but this very simple song may just be my favourite Stevie Wonder song of all. Reminds me of one of the best school days, long white socks pleated skirts and 'sharp' blazers, hot dogs after school from the ice cream man !?! and cream cakes..



Yes it may be... but then there's always .. Lately...

Mary J

Saturday 26 November 2011

A Movement in time.. the story of the MetB.P.A







Tales from the cript..

Missing my blog - been so busy trying to get a few things done..
Nearly there now.. who hoo.. I'm very pleased
I'm now about to write something on the MetBPA, looks very interesting actually - I feel a glass of wine will be a nice treat for later..

Esp as I just done burnt my veggie burger.. tastes like ash.. argh.. ( kwap we eat eh Reggie:)

Anyway... treat yourself while I'm gone.. I'm armed with my pen.. and I'm going it

Back later..

I will be done :)

Catch up with everyones posts:)..

Wishing George Michael a speedy recovery.. our George eh..top man

Mail article







Wednesday 23 November 2011

Press TV; Racism in Europe; &.. Gender Equality







*****

Is Gender equality a myth?

I attended a recent lecture on gender & discrimination where it was discussed that; whilst some men earned £36 an hour, some of the lowest paid women were earning £6.78...

In terms of economic inactivity,( where the women neither work or claims benefits) 79% of them were of Bangladeshi background, 42% Africa, 29% Caribbean and 25% white...

As I said then, this could mean several things... either that their husbands are so rich that they don't need to work, or culture dictates that the women's position is in the home, even if the husband earns very little (if anything)

It's a difficult one... but when you look at those stats again and equate it to ill health etc... it may be possible to work out which is which..


Also (which possibly isn't news) it turns out that when a man has children it has no impact on his career whatsoever, his work life balance remains steady at 90% and rising, whereas for a woman it drops to 50% then crawls back up to 80% once the child turns 18yrs ...and on that note, whilst 61% of all lone parents in Britain are female, only 5% are male..

( Yet this is also where gender inequality gets a bit skewed in my opinion, as I don't know many women who would walk away from raising their children..)

***

Anyway..
Despite being qualified men still dominate in managerial or leadership positions whereas women are over represented in adminsiative .. men on average earn more than women, same jobs, same qualifications, which is changing.. but slowly...and then... when you talk about women, you also have to talk about *race...

Gender equality is not homogeneous..
So whilst I am a woman, racial disadvantage will potentially have the greatest impact, and 'womens rights' seem reluctant, or oddly silent on that particular issue

So gender equality? .. do they mean me too?
I don't think so.
Are black women the known unknowns?
Can racism also lurk behind gender?
How would you know?

Still, this isn't a gender battle..
Women and men are fundamentally different, and there are times when the equality argument loses itself. A woman raising her children is of no less importance than a man earning millions for a FTSE company...
Question is... do you believe that?

Perhaps, that's the real argument..
It's a matter of value, where we place it, and how that value can be compensated in real terms.
What measures are in place to ensure that a woman is not disadvantaged because she has children?, or has spent time raising them? ( and in some cases supporting her husband)

I remember in France a while back a woman in Sarkozy's cabinet going back to work days after giving birth..

I wondered what she thought she was doing (I was confused.. was it some kind of women's lib stance?)or what kind of employer did she have, to have made her feel that pressure to return under those circumstances..
Did she choose it?
Who knows?.. If memory serves me correctly.. I have a feeling she got fired shortly afterwards...

Not all women have children, true..
But depending on how you see equality, it will always be equality for some, but not for all.. e.g more women in the board room doesn't necessarily equate to improved and fairer lives for women..depending on who those women are... it may simply mean... more women in the boardroom.

Anyway... I digress big time...

What I wanted to show you was this...
An independent review has been carried out by Lord Davis into women on boards and the aim is to encourage FTSE 350 companies to aim for 25% female representation by 2015... and this... was the launch...


*ethnicity

Have a nice day