A friend of mine explained to me that she wanted to express her femininity more.
Be more feminine
She said she's an 'Aries woman', and (according to her) 'Aries women' tend to have more masculine traits
We had a discussion about whether or not it's true that men can 'rob' women of their right to be feminine ( perform femininity) purely from the man's inability or reluctance to 'hold up thier ( masculine) end' so to speak.
We talked about whether or not there has been a negative impact in the increase of the role of the female breadwinner ( in male female relationships) , and whether or not a 'male homebody'... in the eyes of some women, becomes a 'no-body'
Then we chatted about why it's often said that some men resent women who take care of them financially because they feel as though they're being 'emasculated'. and whilst they tend not to refuse the cash, they may then use it to get a bit of 'pum' on the side.. out of spite in some instances, or simply to increase the male ego
Funny the crap you talk about some days...
Anyway,
My friend experiences these issues as she is financially in a decent place, yet has continuously attracted men who wont/can't commit but will happily blow her...ahem... budget
So step one in her new feminine approach was to ... dye her hair red in places
the next day she sent me a message...
'Do you think I look like this?!'.....
I laughed so hard... 'you cannot be serious..'
well... trim your beard a bit love...
When I finally stopped laughing I simply said, 'no.. relax... you don't look like that'
...you look cute...well... cuter...
and alot more feminine..
Mission accomplished.. even though I'm sure there's more to it than that!
I don't think your friend needs to examine "femininity" and "masculinity" (both social constructs) so much as asking why she does not value herself enough not to stop being an easy touch for freeloading "users." And I'm saying this from personal experience because I've been there and done that myself. Look for a truly equal partner -- one who has a job and takes responsibility for their own lives. She'll be much happier!
ReplyDeleteI think its' a result of sheer frustration !
DeleteBut that's good advice Debra.. for sure